Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Better Pass the Butter to Betty

I had no idea when I married HOB that the man of my dreams had one tragic flaw.

Apparently, thirty years ago I was so dazzled by the short black socks worn with jogging shorts and the slick way he opened the door of his Pinto Family Wagon that I was blind to his shortcomings.

It was soon after we were married that he said those words that haunt me even to this day: “I don’t like peanut butter.”

Oh my ears! They burn!

He blames his mother, of course. Apparently, she overdid it on the peanut butter sandwiches when he was a child and he has yet to get over it. I have suggested therapy. He has not gone for it.

Generally, I distrust people who don’t like peanut butter. Indeed, they are on my list of those who need to be watched. And I mean carefully watched. Something is not right.

Valuable Bonus Information: As part of my beauty regimen, I have consumed peanut butter nearly every day of my life for the past 40 years. I go for the natural stuff—peanuts, oil, salt. That’s it. Trader Joe’s chunky, salted peanut butter is my favorite. I can live with Laura Scudder’s if I absolutely have to.

Here are items from my typical breakfast menu:

Cereal: (bite-sized Shredded Wheat dipped in peanut butter.)

Fruit: (a banana or apple dipped in peanut butter.)

(I think you get the idea.)

English Muffin?

Toast?

Waffle?

Pancake?

All of these foods are merely Peanut Butter Delivery Systems to me.

In a pinch, so is a spoon, or a finger.



I am proud to say I have raised two boys who love peanut butter. Evan will eat it just about anytime. He has adopted my Shredded Wheat regimen. Sonny Boy likes to make toast, pile on peanut butter and then put the whole thing under the broiler for a short time.

Two-Step Toast. Now that’s livin’.

Poor HOB, scarred by his childhood. He does not understand our love of the chunky brown goo. He does know, however, that when Betty is out of peanut butter, Betty is not happy, so he’s always willing to pick up a jar for me when he goes to the store.

Hummmm….I guess that makes him a Peanut Butter Delivery System too.

I knew there was a reason I love that man so much.



A Two-Day Supply for Betty

64 comments:

Mamma has spoken said...

That's a lot of peanut butter! Did you know yesterday was National Eat Peanut Butter Day? Neither did I but a nice student pointed it out and asked what it meant. Hard to explain when you are a nut free school.

Gaston Studio said...

HOB has got to be the only person I've EVER heard of that doesn't like peanut butter! Yep, a finger or a spoon works for me too.

Mary Ann said...

In the dark distant past, when I seemed to have more time, I used to make my own peanut butter...nice and chunky. I only like natural..100% peanuts... with no additives. I'm a purist when it comes to my PB. How can you live without peanut butter?

Lin said...

I will support HOB here--while I will eat peanut butter, I do not like bacon. Most people gasp when I admit that.

My kids LOVE peanut butter on pancakes with syrup.

Madi and Mom said...

Morning BB,
After I stopped LOLing at the mental image of HOB in the short black socks and jogging shorts, I became instantly suspicious of him too. Really who in their right mind doesn't like peanut butter?
He probably won't eat apple pie either? Even Madi likes peanut butter.
Hugs C and Madi

Seams Inspired said...

Can't even imagine a day without Peanut Butter. I knew we were kindred! ;o)

PS...Trader Joe's recently opened in my neck of the woods. I'll be stopping in to give their PB a try. Thanks for the recommendation! Happy Wednesday! :o)

Anne Gallagher said...

Peanut Butter is akin to breathing. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack, who won't eat a PB sandwich, with bananas and a sprinkle of sugar is the best. (But not fried, sorry Elvis.)

Perhaps the black socks are hindering HOB's taste buds.

Leah J. Utas said...

Peanut butter is a go-to for me when I can't think of anything else to eat. Both husband and I have an unnatural fondness for peanut butter cookies.

Parsley said...

Peanut butter is NOM NOM NOM NOM!

So your hubs doesn't like it...just more for you!

baygirl32 said...

peanut butter is one of the best inventions in the world, especially paired with chocolate

laughingmom said...

I have one child that wont touch it and one who eats it EVERY day. But hubby is the worst - he's a peanut butter snob - raised on nasty stuff called Deep South Peanut Butter - he'll only eat Jif - preferably Extra Crunchy.

welcome to my world of poetry said...

My Betty that is alot of peanut butter, personally I don't like it very much.

Have a good day.
Yvonne.

Out on the prairie said...

I made friends with exchange students when I pulled my jar out in Czech on the train.I like it with a slice of american chees for a sandwhich.A Mennonite store I go to has 3 flavors and you push the button and fill your container, made right there.

Sara said...

So, I'm not the only one who slathers peanut butter onto pancakes, French toast, and waffles?? (And then glugs on the maple syrup?) Whew. Solidarity, sister!

Teresa Evangeline said...

I threw up peanut butter and toast when I was a kid, so I swore off it for awhile, too, but now I'm all cured and I have only four words to say:: Peanut butter and honey

Linda said...

I grew up on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. That was the lunch that I toted to school every single school day. My hubby, however, had never had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in his life when we married and complained that he didn't like peanut butter because it stuck to the roof of his mouth. So I introduced him to the joy of combining it with jelly, and he was hooked. We now have bread and peanut butter and jelly on our packing list for vacations, and it's Hubby's go-to food when he just wants something to eat but doesn't know what.

I love peanut butter in almost any form, but my favorite way of eating it is in Reeses Peanut Butter Cups. :)

LittleSilkDress said...

I don't like peanut butter, either. I know, BB. Our relationship will never be the same.

Joey @ Big Teeth and Clouds said...

My high school Algebra 2 teacher used to tell us about his love of peanut butter. "You could put peanut butter on an ole rubber tire and I'd eat it," he would say.

I think you'd be destined to fail in a relationship with another peanut butter fanatic. You'd always be fighting over the butter.

Bouncin' Barb said...

What a great post. Peanut butter is the staple of life in our house. Peanut butter and jelly on a hot toasted bagel. All runny and gooey....Oh I'm making one right now! Nice to meet you Betty!

Brian said...

Ny nink nits perrty fune...sorry, it was stuck to the roof of my mouth...I think it's pretty funny!!!

KLZ said...

I am so angry that there is not a jar of the good stuff at my desk right now.

Nat said...

Better add me to that list - I'm not a mjor peanut butter fan (horror!) OK, now and again on hot toast but that's my limit :-)

mskanorado said...

I personally LOVE peanut butter as well! Sometimes I just want a spoonful of it - my husband enjoy peanut butter but not that much! Chocolate and peanut butter is another fave! My husband hates Apples because his mother ruined them for him, don't get me wrong I don't LOVE them either, I don't eat them unless I have to but I do enjoy using them in stuff (pies, apple chip cake, etc.) the Hubby, not so much.

Jules said...

Well you can trust me, I too love the stuff. Hard to be southern and not love peanut butter :)
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

Cake Betch said...

I love peanut butter too, despite the fact that I had some trauma similar to your husbands. My school would sell peanut butter sandwiches with the jelly separate and not only was there an inch of peanut butter per millimeter smear of jelly, it was thick, goopy, and tasteless. I went almost 6 years before I ate it again.

Susan in the Boonies said...

Betty, you know what leaves my knees weak?
Peanut butter blossom cookies, warm, soft and fresh out of the oven, with a Hershey's kiss on top, all melty from the heat of the soft peanut butter cookie.

Hilary said...

Well that does it.. I know what I'm having for lunch, now. I love to cut an apple into wedges and spread some peanut butter on them. That's a yummy breakfast for me. So nice of you to accept your hubby in spite of his shortcomings. It must be how stylish he is. ;)

blueviolet said...

I don't like peanut butter at all! But I do like peanuts. Does that count for anything?

Talli Roland said...

Don't ever move to England, Betty, They haven't got on the peanut butter love train over here, and it's actually quite a feat to find it! :)

Tracy said...

Oh, I'm with you Girl, I LOVE Peanut butter and my favorite candy is Reese's Peanut Butter cups...those are to die for! AND I love DQ blizzards with Reese's peanut butter cup and chocolate soft serve....and, well, you get the point.

Velvet Over Steel said...

That's Awesome! I love peanutbutter on just about everything too. I don't even like chocolate unless it's in a Reeses!! :-)

roxy said...

Lol. Peanut butter is awesome, Betty. Your husband sounds like a good-hearted man, despite his aversion to ambrosia. Wonderful post, but now I feel the need to make myself a PB&J.

Nezzy said...

Oh honey, I'm with ya...I can make a meal outta a spoon and some peanut butter!

Never had Trader Joe's version!

God bless and have an amazin' day!

Giveaway...my place!

Pat Tillett said...

You've always been one of my favorites, but now you've risen even higher! I also LOVE peanut butter. Sometimes, I just eat it by the spoon full and yes, I've even dipped my finger in the jar for a little treat. My favorites are pancakes, waffles, and french toast! When I was a kid, we would mix peanut butter, butter and maple syrup in a bowl and use that on just about everything...

Liz said...

You and Craig would get along famously, BB. PB is almost as important as his face cream!

Old Kitty said...

Awwwww Poor HOB!!! Scarred for life and missing out on this most glorious of glorious essential foodstuff!!

I love peanut butter!!! Crunchy, smooth, organic - especially with strawberry jam and white bread and butter. Heaven on the palate!!
:-)

Yay for you and your boys!! And HOB too for being part of the peanut butter delivery system!

Take care
x

Ann said...

I LOVE peanut butter. Did you know that peanut butter is the worlds best hiccup cure? Yep, got hiccups just grab a big old spoon of peanut butter and stick the whole thing in your mouth. Presto! hiccups are gone :)

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

There's something wrong with the man - and I mean that in a nice way!

Gigi said...

Yummmmmm - peanut butter on a spoon! We must be related, Betty. I love that HOB is a Peanut Butter Delivery System!

Baby Sister said...

Boyfriend is the same way as HOB, and blames his mother too. I find it tragic!! PB and I are best friends!! I'm not a huge fan of chunky, but I could put PB on just about anything and be happy.

Marlene said...

You know - don't yell at me...but I LOVE peanut butter, yet I can't even remember the last time I ate it! It's probably been years! What is wrong with me?

I shall endeavor to have peanut butter tomorrow!

Daisy said...

Poor HOB. Think how sad it must be to live a life without peanut butter. Although, he lives with Betty, so he actually has done quite well for himself, in spite of the no peanut butter gene. :D

Lydia K said...

I like peanut butter but have converted to sunbutter because of allergies at my house. I'm just as happy!

Brian (not the cat) said...

My favorite delivery system is celery, though I don't have it that often. For breakfast, I eat Cheerios in bed, with the cat sitting on me and periodically trying nonchalantly to stick his paw into the bowl. I haven't figured out exactly why he does this; after all, he knows that he gets to drink the remaining milk after all the Cheerios have been scooped up.

The Retired One said...

Oh, Thank GOD...finally!! Someone ELSE who hates peanut butter! When I tell them they look at me like I have 3 heads. And to top it off, I do not like any nuts at all..None. No walnuts, no cashews...NONE of them! And to add to people REALLY staring at me...I hate mint too. ha

Jimmy said...

Peanut Butter and Banana sandwiches and one Cindy introduced me to that you may want to try..Peanut Butter and Bacon sandwich, you can't go wrong with that.

Ella said...

He is a keeper; he keeps you supplied when you run low! I call that sweet! Fun to read~ I love pbutter toast for breakfast and evening snacks! ;-D

Miriam in KS said...

Have you ever tried it grilled? Mmmmmm.

jenny_o said...

The funny thing about peanut butter for me is how much I love it when I'm eating it and how bad it smells to me when I'm not! Weird. But I can't imagine life without it.

Shan said...

Our nearest TJ's is about 60 miles out. Argh! But(!) there is a fresh peanut (or almond) butter maker at the local joint. That is some seriously good stuff. I can't stand Laura Scudders... but it may have more to do with the sound of the knife clanking against glass *shudder* than the actual flavor.

Pat said...

Peanut butter on bread - whether it be toasted or plain - is one of my favorites. Yum!

Zuzana said...

You know Betty, peanut butter seems to me to be such an American item:;) And to be honest, it is a bit like with coffee - an acquired taste.
When I tasted it for the first time, it felt a bit off to me but got used to it after a while. Still, the only way I liked it was on my toast with jelly.;)
xoxo

ethelmaepotter! said...

Put me in HOB's amp - I am not a PB fan. I am also not a fan of milk chocolate - dark is definitely the way to go. BUT...peanut butter WITH milk chocolate, as in Reese's Peanut Butter Cups -YUM-MEE!

1 Funky Woman said...

We are peanut butter eaters in our house as well. When I grew up though my brother was very allergic and still is so we had to be very careful and not eat it around him! My mother was specific to her peanut butter and it was Peter Pan plain not chunky and no on could use it, so funny!

I am the only one that likes chunky though. We just got a Trader Joes not too far away. I'm gonna try your kind!

Oh and a spoonful with chocolate chips sure is yummy!

Thanks for the following, following you back!

Megan

Donna said...

I love the stuff as Well!
hughugs

Madi and Mom said...

No matter what Madi says....she soaks up the spot light or flash light in this case. As long as I put the props beside her when she sees them she doesn't move. She'd make a good model for cat food..
Lol
C

Jenny said...

I am still laughing over your remark "peanut butter delivery system'.

What a fun post.

floweringmama said...

Don't forget about soft shell tortillas smeared with peanut butter wrapped around a banana!

Andrea said...

Don't hate...but Peanut Butter (and I capitalized for it's importance to you to "butter" you up a little) is one of those foods I could take or leave...but before you judge! I was one of those kids who had to watch what she ate because of allergies - no, thank heavens, I was not allergic to the "butter of the peanut", but maybe that's why I became so ambivalent. I tended to love only the foods I couldn't have...chocolate, yes, I said CHOCOLATE!!
Maybe you can cut good ole "ankle socks" some slack...and, since he made the "To be watched" list, does that mean I make some intermediate list like, "To be peered at occasionally with a sideways glance"?

Barbara Shallue said...

My husband and I both love peanut butter (especially in any kind of dessert -with chocolate!) but my youngest is life-threateningly allergic! I feel so sorry for her...

Medeia Sharif said...

I can only eat peanut butter mixed with something else.

I used to eat it everyday, so I'm now sick of it by itself. Strange, I know.

Patti Lacy said...

Right there with ya, Betty. It's SO satisfying olfactorily, texturally, tastily...

yep, I have worked WAY too hard today.

Time for a Reese's.
I've missed this place:)

The Chicken's Consigliere said...

I have always felt very sorry for people who are allergic to peanut butter. Except for the fact that I can't send littleb to school with a peanut butter sandwich, which would be so easy. That annoys me. But overall compassion outweighs annoyance.

Cricket said...

Heh, heh. I could do an entire jar, straight... just me and a spoon.

Years ago, I lived right near the Teddie peanut butter factory. when the wind was right, the whole neighborhood reeked of roasting peanuts. Wow.

Many, many sandwiches were consumed on those days.