Wednesday, January 19, 2011

It Suits Him



HOB's father's funeral is this coming weekend. Since we live in California, his dad lived in Nashville, and the funeral is in Kansas City, there's been some major planning. HOB is with his mom now, Evan and I fly out on Thursday, and Sonny Boy joins us on Friday.

All the plane schedules, hotel reservations, and car reservations are in place, and it was a complicated process. Perhaps not as complicated, however, as taking the disinterested-in-fashion seventeen-year-old Evan shopping for a suit.

I'd like to say that both of my boys have crisp white shirts, freshly pressed suits, and shiny black shoes in their closets, but alas, this is not so. Now, Sonny Boy was ready and willing to get a suit. He is graduating from college soon after all, and despite being Earth Boy, there is also a streak of GQ in there as well. He took care of the situation right away and did a great job

Evan, on the other hand, considers clean jeans, a t-shirt with a logo, and skate shoes formal wear, so when I announced that we needed to get him a suit, he was less than thrilled. He hates shopping. Hates it. He also saw absolutely no need for a suit and he let me know about it. As a bonus, I got a twenty minute lecture on the hypocrisy of dressing up and how sad it was that I had bought into the whole idea perpetuated by a society based solely on appearance.

That was fun.

He is still growing so I didn't want to go for the hand-tailored hundreds-of-dollars suits. He is also between menswear and Giant Boywear in size. Giant Boywear is a whole lot less expensive so we headed over to that department of the department store. No luck. The size 18 was too small and the store was out of 20's. So, we headed over to the men's department.

Now, I know pretty much nothing about men's sizing, so I said to Evan, "OK, I'll go over to that side of the store and look for the smallest size I can find and you stay here and look." I was busy flipping through the jackets when out of the corner of my eye I saw a flash of silver. I looked up to see the long hook the store supplies to get merchandise down being swung around, bounced up and down, and being flipped over in the air. When I got over to Evan, he was concentrating on balancing it on his palm.

"Find anything?" I asked dryly.

The hook came down to his side. "Nah, they don't have any."

OK.

The evening pretty much went on and on like that until we went to another store and found a Giant Boy suit that we could get tailored. We decided to leave the purchasing of shoes for the next day while I still had an ounce of sanity left.

A suit, a tie, black socks, white shirt, black leather shoes: we'll pack them all and my boy will look devastatingly handsome as we pay tribute to his grandfather.

Now, if only I knew what I was wearing....


42 comments:

Joann Mannix said...

First of all Betty, I missed your birthday yesterday. Happy Belated Birthday. I hope it was joyous.

I'm so sorry over your loss. Tell your boy that nothing strikes a glow in a girl's heart like a well dressed man. Maybe that'll change his mind from now on.

I know the perils of shopping with teens. I have a reputation for announcing we are done right in the middle of the shopping, just because one can only take so much teen shopping angst.

Tabor said...

I remember these days with my son. He also felt that dressing up was giving in to a shallow cultural symbol. To this day he wears torn jeans and t-shirts and only wears a suit when he goes to an awards ceremony for his girl friend.

Flartus said...

Ugh. Perhaps all the details are to help us put off thinking about our loss until we're gathered with the family? Unless you find yourself crying in the Giant Boys' shoe section, in which case--not so effective.

So sorry for HOB's and your loss.

(I was muttering the same thing as Evan's appearance-based tirade last night, as I was trying to get Miss Chef's pant seams aligned so I could iron the &%$#@ things. He's not so far off-base, really.)

Lori said...

I can recall walking out of a store in the middle of shopping at least a few times, in all my years of taking my teenagers shopping. Since I am not a shopper I suppose that doesn't help things. I'm glad you got it done and now can focus on you. My condolances again to all of you. I pray that your travels are safe and that all goes as planned. XX

Vodka Logic said...

My husband is capable of buying his own clothes thank goodness and I have daughters so shopping is "easier"

Hilary said...

Oh I remember those days well. My older son was no problem. My younger one grew like a weed and what fitted fine for last year's funeral no longer worked for the following year's wedding. I finally followed wise advice and took him shopping at Goodwill stores where there were plenty of inexpensive suits in perfect condition, simply outgrown by the previous teen. Those carried him through the years until he quit growing.

Safe travels, Betty. And hugs to you.

Seams Inspired said...

My boys are exactly the same way, though a bit younger than yours. I admit E has a point about the dressing up, though I love to dress nice. And since I live in the South, that argument is like a bucket that holds no water. The Matriarchs would go into apoplexy if someone were to show up to a funeral in something other than a suit. I think their tongues are still wagging from when I had the audacity to wear a dress with no pantyhose. ;o)

Safe travels and (((HUGS))) to you my bloggy friend. Try to soak up some of our home state for me. :o)

Brian said...

Y'all please travel safely, we will be thinking of you.

Georgina Dollface said...

Have a safe trip. Whatever you find to wear, it will be lovely. When my Dad died, I wore a large hat and dark glasses. Sitting in the front, with hundreds of people behind me, having the hat and sunglasses made me feel like I had some privacy to cry my eyes out at the service and not have to be brave for everyone. Take care. - G

Jules said...

I so understand the tailoring thing and women have a much harder time with it. I hope you have a peaceful, blessed trip that is a fitting tribute to your departed loved one.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

Madi and Mom said...

Morning BB...I've never had to shop w/for teenage boys; however teenage girls are always happy to shop.
I'm so glad you were able to find something suitable for E w/o too much of a battle of wills.
As for BB:
Now that the sons are set she will find something perfect in her closet. I send you and your family my prays and safe travel wishes.
Hugs
Cecilia

Stephen Tremp said...

A belated happy birthday to you! Have a great and safe week.

Baby Sister said...

Good luck with that...I'd rather find something for someone else to wear than for me. I hope you're having a good day!! Good luck this weekend/rest of the week. :)

Pat said...

I am sorry for your loss.

Sadly, my son is STILL like this. And he's 30. Not married, lives alone. Definitely not the GQ material like your older son. Nope. For his grandfather's funeral he packed his suit coat (with pin stripes) but forgot his pants.

blueviolet said...

I'm sorry those are the circumstances in which he had to buy a suit though. :(

I had a huge problem trying to find one for my son too around that age. I lost my my MIL, my FIL, and then my own dad within 9 months time so he had to have a suit.

BECKY said...

I have 2 sons, and 2 bonus sons...and I can relate...on a couple of them! I'm sorry about your loss, and I hope you have a good trip there and back home again.

Old Kitty said...

Of course your boys will look stunning in their suits!!! Sons of BB are totally amazing!!! Such rebels and such characters! They do their grandad proud!

Take care
x

GreatGranny said...

Sorry for your loss. You and your boys will look handsome and lovely respectively. Hope you have decent weather while there for the funeral.

faye said...

I have a GIANT BOY of my own...
only he is 60 and I gave up trying to get him to buy anything but shorts
and polos.... I have bought his
non-play clothes for years.. otherwise he would probably go to
work in holey jeans and sneakers....

Sorry for your loss.

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Sorry for your loss and I hope your journey is a safe one.

Take care.
Yvonne.

The Adorkable Ditz said...

Your son sounds like my brother in terms of shopping for clothes. My mom has to hold him down to get dressed nicely and get cleaned up for it. My brother is a handsome man, but acts way too much like a child a lot of the time. It's annoying.

/theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com

Marlene said...

Suits are so over-rated. Ok, maybe not for a funeral. Hugs.

Lindy MacDuff said...

Very sorry to hear of your father-in-law's passing.

Glad you were able to get a suit for Evan.

As for you, I think snow boots will be in order for Kansas City as they are being snowed upon today. And you might want to consider baselayer clothing as their temperatures are in the teens and low 20s. =(

Good luck with the travel. Hope you do not encounter any delays.

Liz said...

I hope the search for shoes isn't nearly as painful.

Again, I'm very sorry, BB.

Ann said...

My son actually loves to shop and he loves to spend money on clothes. However, should a wedding, funeral or some other even arise that requires one to be more formally attired he HAS to go buy something new. Wouldn't you think that the dress shirt and pants he bought the last time would be sufficient?

Mamma has spoken said...

I oh so feel your pain! I have sons who are the same way. Much prefer shopping with the GQ one than the 'fight the establishment' one. Though GQ can cost me a lot of money by the end of the trip!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I think your line "That was fun" sums it up very well. I would've hit him with a talk about being thoughtful and respectful during a difficult time. And if that didn't work, I'd just hit him.
Probably a good thing I don't have kids.
Really sorry for your loss, Betty. Safe flying on Thursday.

Sarah said...

If he gets an engineering job he'll never have to dress up. Now that suits him very well, I think.

floweringmama said...

Grrrrr, been there done that with the clothes.

And get to do it all over again.

Daisy said...

I know what you mean with boys and dress clothes. The two just don't mix very well.

Keeping you and yours in my prayers as you travel. Sending good thoughts your way. Hugs to you.

slommler said...

That is such a "mom" thing. Get the entire household outfitted and forget about herself!! Sigh! Hope you find something stylish and comfortable
Hugs
SueAnn

McGillicutty said...

awww what a task to have to complete and with a deadline too. urgh. Hope your travels are safe, lovely pictures btw!!!!

My Big Secret Blog :) said...

I am sure Even will look very handsome as you pay tribute to HOB's Dad and somehow, I know you will look beautiful. :) Travel safe.

Lydia K said...

Happy Belated Birthday!

Hope you stay safe and warm in your travels, and hope those new shiny black shoes don't get too slushy!

Joyful said...

Aw, I empathize with you on your shopping trip. It isn't much fun during an especially sad and trying time. I'm glad you at least managed to find something though. Safe travels.

jenny_o said...

It's exasperating when kids choose such a bad time to have such a discussion. Sounds like you handled it very well. I also know the feeling of not having enough time to spend on getting yourself ready when you have to get others ready first. Travel safely, hope all goes well.

Cool Gal said...

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. May you find comfort in family, friends, and memories durning this difficult time.

I have the same problem with my son. In fact, I spent the weekend shopping for him for an upcoming vacation in which he needs some dress clothes. He didn't mind what I picked out, but informed me he would be wearing tennis shoes. Ugg...

Wishing you a happy belated birthday. I hope your day was everything you hoped it would be. You SO deserve to feel special!

Shan said...

You could have a boy like mine who, after wearing his special outfit to Homecoming last year had to have it wrestled off of him so he wouldn't wear it every day for the next three weeks.

Smooth travels and peaceful hearts and minds to you and your family, BB.

Love ya,

Shan :+)

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Thanks for the visit and comment, I knew you wouldn't mind using your photograph,

Have a good day.
Yvonne,

ds said...

I am sorry for your loss. Travel safe...

Pat Tillett said...

What a great mom you are! Making sure everyone else was taken care of before you worried about yourself!
great post my friend!

Lin said...

I'm with the kid--do they really need suits for that?? Aw, I guess they do, don't they? I hate how much those darn things cost. Ugh. Maybe he can wear it to a dance at school or something later on.