Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Is That a Bomb Pop or Is It Just Your Phenomenon Flaring Up Again?

Can You Do This?

I didn't think so. What if I told you I could will this to happen using only the incredible power of my mind? Wouldn't that be impressive?

I have what is referred to as Primary Raynaud's Disease or the less scary sounding Primary Raynaud's Phenomenon. (I prefer the latter since I like the sound and the connotations of "phenomenon" and really, the word "disease" should be saved for really, really serious stuff.) This means that when there is a fairly sudden change in temperature, my fingers (and sometimes my toes) tend to turn white because of a lack of blood supply. If it goes on too long, the fingers turn blue from lack of oxygen and then, when the blood vessels do finally open up again, the area turns a pretty shade of deep red. (I feel so patriotic when it happens. Go U.S.A!!!!)

Oh, it's quite the show and one I do not mind sharing with friends and co-workers. When it happens at work, I enjoy going to my colleagues' offices and making sure they get a good look by shoving my hands in front of their faces when they are trying to grade papers or are on the phone. They just love it and I get the reaction a dramatic gal like Betty craves.

I have to seek these reactions at work because around the house, it's no big deal. In fact, I was making supper when I got the above attack and to get this picture taken, I had to impress upon Evan that this really was a photo op moment and explained it was for my peeps on my blog. He took the picture, but then wondered when supper was going to be served. Numbness in the hands is no reason for a delay in food delivery by the female food-delivery system.

"Oh Betty!" you say, concerned, worried, distraught. "Does it hurt?" Thank you for your overwhelming interest. It's irritating when the fingers are numb and a bit painful when the blood supply is cut off and also when it starts flooding into the digits, but I just live with it, and smile through the pain. This suffering means nothing to Betty whose constitution and will to live is strong. After a confab with my doctors (Web MD and Wikipedia) I have been assured that it's not serious unless it is associated with another disease. ( I have been to my real doctor who said the same thing. Thank goodness she reads the same web pages I do.)

To avoid having this reaction, I tend to wear gloves when it gets a bit chilly. One time I was at a coffee shop with a group of women and after MANY remarks about my wearing gloves indoors and how I looked like Michael Jackson in the early 80's, I did the following, 1) whipped off my gloves and smiled as they watched in horror, my fingertips turning a ghostly white and 2) dropped in conversation the "disease" portion of my affliction. (OK, it was cheap, but they immediately began buying me warm drinks and complimenting my hairstyle.)

Changes in temperature bring this on, but so can extremely stressful events or situations. So, if you are ever in conversation with me and there has been not sudden change in temperature and you notice my fingers changing colors like those light-up, color-changing pens purchased at the 99 Cent Store, you may want to change whatever subject you've been expounding upon. Betty is sending up Awkward Social Situation Flares, five of them to be exact. Think of it as an Early Warning System. Betty might just blow. Get her some warm gloves, a warm drink, and some good chocolate. Remember, excessive, heartfelt compliments have also been known to help the situation too. Apply as necessary.


Yours in Good Health,
Betty



7 comments:

Brian said...

My, what an attractive place mat you have.

Brian said...

Or is that a pillow?

Eileen Simmons said...

I have it, too, but probably not as severe as yours. And I haven't used it for dramatic effect. But I could... might bring some excitement to S4 at Fulton. . .

Bossy Betty said...

Brian--Why yes it IS an attractive place mat, but now you have my mind spinning as to how Ii could make a throw pillow out of it. It would also make a snappy vest. It already has fringe!

Bossy Betty said...

Eileen-Don't sell yourself short! Let's have a contest next time we are together!

Susan said...

Betty, I have known you for 23 years and I have never seen this phenomenom! You are still a woman of mystery to me!

Susan said...

I meant to say phenomenon